For the past couple of weeks I have been in a funk. There are so many things in my life to be thankful for; however, I am finding myself melancholy most of the time. It amazes me how our emotions can really take control of our minds and paralyze us. Have you ever felt this way? Instead of being proactive about my life’s situations, I have wanted to crawl back in bed and sleep.
I know this is not a healthy behavior and so I am wanting to get to the bottom of it! Here are a few things I have been pondering lately that I wanted to share with you.
- I’ve allowed myself to get into unhealthy daily routines. Instead of working out in the morning and taking a shower, I have instead scratched the working out part completely and waited until the middle of the day to get ready. I have told myself and my husband that I am too tired in the mornings to work out and that our kids need me in the morning, hence I take care of their needs before my own. This routined behavior has not been for my benefit or the benefit of my family.
- I’ve forgotten how I used to have fun before having kids. This sounds awful I know, but it’s true. I am 38 and my life has been consumed with meeting the needs of those around me instead of figuring out what I enjoy doing as well. There was a day recently when I took my daughter out to have our nails manicured. I NEVER do this! It’s too much money. I could be using this money to buy clothes for the kids, etc. But I have to tell you, it was a really nice experience. We also took my husband out to go zip-lining for his birthday. He asked me to go on it with him and the kids, but I chickened out and became the picture taking, items holding momma that watched from the sidelines, wishing I would have said yes. I need to be more intentional about scheduling fun into my life.
- Water & Vitamins! I didn’t realize how amazing water was until I found myself in the backseat of my car dizzy and dehydrated because I drank a huge cup of coffee and barely any water that day. That one “little” episode cost my husband to come back to the church to drive me home, which put me in bed lethargic for three days! That behavior cost me and my family a lot! I also had forgotten the importance of taking vitamins everyday. Hey, I’m a busy homeschool mom, I don’t have time to remember everything on my “To Do” list! Not a good enough answer! When I was younger I didn’t need to think about taking vitamins. The bouncing back rate was extremely high. Now, I need to have a reality check. I am getting older. My body is changing and it needs to be replenished with water and vitamins daily in order to function properly.
- Sleep. Oh sleep, how I’ve longed to be in your arms all night long! This has been a great struggle for me this past year. Our sleeping environment is not the greatest right now. Plus, again I’m not who I once was when I was in my 20s. The biggest culprit for my sleep deprivation has been my cell phone. If I can’t sleep, it’s like my phone is whispering into my ear, “Come check me out. You can listen to podcasts, you can read the Bible, you can go on Facebook. I don’t care what you do as long as you look into my screen and wake up your brain!” This bad habit has got to stop immediately!
- Spending more quality and quiet time with the Lord. I do have times throughout the day when I am worshipping Him, reading His word, and praying, but I can do more. I need to schedule alone times with God daily that are not on Periscope 😉 He is my Rock! He is the manna I need in order to be nourished and refreshed.
- Lastly, trusting God COMPLETELY with EVERY detail of my life. Ever time I do this, I feel His peace that surpasses all understanding. Fear is a daily struggle for me that loves to come and torment my emotions, but trusting in God dispels ALL fear!
I knew I needed to write a new blog post, but I was stuck until I decided to be completely honest and transparent with where I am finding myself right now. Today is a new day! I made myself workout (I hated every minute of it), take a shower, had lots of water, and took my vitamins. I do have a bag of caramel popcorn right beside me that I have been chomping on (baby steps), but I feel better moving a few steps forward in the right direction.
No matter where we are in life, there are times when we will somehow get into a rut like I have, not knowing how we got there or how to get out. Thankfully, our lives are made up of seasons and marathons, not snow storms and sprints. God is so gracious to give us do-overs every 24 hours to start again. I am committed to moving myself in the right direction. Please hold me accountable. If you are going through the same thing right now, you are not alone. Please let me know and I will be praying for you, encouraging you to keep moving forward towards joy, peace, hope and love.